I’m Living My Best Life: Insecure and All

insecurity

INSECURITY

Lack of self-confidence or assurance; self doubt.

Why is the word INSECURITY such a bad word in our world today?

I do not like how the world forces us to internalize so much garbage by labeling us as weak or damaged when we dare to show a side other than the emotionally well, wonderful human beings we are most of the time. I firmly believe that it is the process of being forced to internalize negative feelings and emotions that cause the most damage to our psyche.

quote by Tonza Ruffin

I experience insecurity in many aspects of my life.

Hopefully, I will be around for many more years to come, which means my future will be peppered with some feelings of insecurity. The reality is we all experience insecurity at some point in our life. When people tell me they have never experienced insecurity, I believe that person is either:

  • afraid to acknowledge his/her insecurities,
  • or that person is a
  • potential sociopath.
quote

At this point in our lives, we would all benefit from taking the masks off and allowing ourselves to experience life void of pretense.

If 2020 has done anything for me, it has reinforced that life is too short and too unpredictable to waste time living a false existence.

So, here are 7 gentle reminders for those that have been taught that insecurity is a sign of weakness:

  • IT IS ABSOLUTELY OKAY TO FEEL INSECURE. IN FACT, IT IS NORMAL.
  • DO NOT TRY TO TALK ABOUT INSECURITIES WITH INDIVIDUALS THAT LIVE LIVES VOID OF EMOTION. EVERYONE IS NOT EQUIPPED TO ACKNOWLEDGE THAT INSECURITY IS NOT A BAD THING.
  • FIND AN EMOTIONALLY SECURE PERSON (A PERSON THAT RECOGNIZES HUMANS EXPERIENCE A WIDE RANGE OF EMOTIONS)AND HOLD ON TO THEM FOR DEAR LIFE.
  • UNTIL YOU FIND THAT EMOTIONALLY SECURE PERSON, WRITE IT DOWN!
  • WHATEVER YOU DO, DO NOT KEEP IT IN. IF YOU INTERNALIZE ALL OF THE GARBAGE, THE WORLD TRIES TO FORCE YOU TO INTERNALIZE, YOU WILL TRULY BE DAMAGED.
  • DAMAGE BLOCKS YOUR ABILITY TO LIVE WITH INTENTION.
  • KNOW THAT YOU ARE LOVED AND YOU ARE NOT ALONE IN THIS JOURNEY OF BEING A IMPERFECT, FALLIBLE HUMAN BEING!

Much Love,

Tonza

books by Tonza Ruffin

Published by Tonza D. Ruffin

Perfectly Imperfect but VERY PROUD WOMAN, MOM, LAWYER, and AUTHOR, but most importantly...LIFE LOVER! I laugh loud, I work hard, I play hard, I am adventurous, I am curious, I am driven, I have moments of deep insecurity, I am loving, I am vulnerable, I am explosive (not one of my finer qualities), I dance around my house alone, I am an awful perfectionist which makes my insecurity worse, I sing out loud in my car without any concern for whose watching, I have trust issues, I do not live through my children, I no longer try to force my children into the mold that I created so that I could feel validated as a mother, I am a risk-taker, I am guarded in my personal life, I am kind, I am grateful. I am so excited about the rest of my life!

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