Don’t Believe The Hype Part II: What is Burnout?

Burnout is not a new phenomenon. It seems that Herbert Freudenberger created the word “burnout” in 1974 when I was 3 years old. In his book, Burnout: The High Cost of High Achievement Freudenberger defined burnout as, “the extinction of motivation or incentive, especially where one’s devotion to a cause or relationship fails to produceContinue reading “Don’t Believe The Hype Part II: What is Burnout?”


I have been a litigator in Eastern North Carolina for 20 years. I have been a mother for 29 years, and for the most part, I have been a single mother to three girls who are 29, 20, and 11. I had my first daughter when I was 19 years old, a teenager. Although IContinue reading “DON’T BELIEVE THE HYPE PART I: I Am Burned Out!”

Vibin’ With Psychotherapist Keischa Pruden

I had such a great conversation with psychotherapist Keischa Pruden about mental health. I figured sharing this convo would be a great way to close out The Vibe for the week! Grab a cup of coffee or a glass of wine, tune in and take advantage of this free therapy session :-). Much Love, TonzaContinue reading “Vibin’ With Psychotherapist Keischa Pruden”

Super Women Don’t Have Time For Mental Illness

One of my all-time favorite movies is Divine Secrets of the Ya-Ya Sisterhood. YA-YA!!! I loved that movie so much that if it weren’t for her father’s strong objection, Gabriella would have been named Sidda Lee. The tight bond that the women maintained despite challenges that tested the bounds of their friendship is one of theContinue reading “Super Women Don’t Have Time For Mental Illness”

How Are You Feeling? Let’s Talk About Mental Health

Several people have suggested that I talk about mental health, so I have decided to do just that. This week each post and Wednesday’s episode of Vibin’ With Tonza (podcast) will be dedicated to mental health awareness! According to the National Institute of Mental Health, nearly 1 in 5 (46.6 million) U.S. adults live withContinue reading “How Are You Feeling? Let’s Talk About Mental Health”

You Are Not Alone

As I quickly walked down the hospital hallway trying to escape from my middle child’s screams I felt alone and weak. My daughter had undergone yet another surgery and was left with a large hole in her body. In order to help the hole to properly heal, the surgeons packed it with 6 to 8Continue reading “You Are Not Alone”

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Pro-Choice and Proud

This is my body! The fact that one attempts to use the government to come in and dictate what I do with it makes me mad as hell. You had absolutely nothing to do with my creation, so why would you believe that you should be given the awesome privilege of telling me what toContinue reading “Pro-Choice and Proud”

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You Know You Are Approaching Fifty When…

The other day my friend asked me, “do you realize we graduated from high school thirty years ago?” I. ALMOST. PASSED. OUT! Thirty years??? Where has all of the time gone? Of course, we would love to be able to turn back the hands of time, and, tweak a few things, but, the more weContinue reading “You Know You Are Approaching Fifty When…”

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Cause I’m A Woman

The twenty something Tonza (as she smiles gleefully): The forty something Tonza (as I give myself the side eye): WHY IN THE WORLD WOULD I TAKE ALL OF THAT ON? Anyone remember the saying, “be careful what you wish for”? It seems to be playing like a broken record in my head as I thinkContinue reading “Cause I’m A Woman”

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I Am Auggie

My youngest daughter and I have been reading the book Wonder by R.J. Palacio. Wonder is about a ten-year-old boy whose nickname is Auggie. As a result of a facial deformity he was born with, Auggie struggles with going to school and making friends. This morning as we were reading, I was overcome with emotion. Unable to hide the sound of myContinue reading “I Am Auggie”

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